


Dear Mr. Jefferson

by SterlingBeryl



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Cabinet Battle, Its something fun, Rap, Why cabinet meetings are so unproductive, poetry?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-25
Updated: 2017-03-25
Packaged: 2018-10-10 10:19:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10435518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SterlingBeryl/pseuds/SterlingBeryl
Summary: Why do you fight every time we meet?Poetry/Rap thingy





	

Dear Mr. Jefferson  
Perhaps we got off on the wrong foot last time.

I would say that I hope you wouldn't mind

We could meet and try to reconcile 

Without passion aggression and bile. 

And I know, full well, that that will be a trial. 

But Alexander Hamilton won't settle for mild.

 

Dear Mr. Hamilton. Thank you for your time 

I really wish that I could respond in kind

But I think you will find that I do mind and think 

There's really no more reason to unwind the kinks. 

 

Jefferson, You swine. 

 

Dear Mr. Hamilton 

Alas I admit it. 

And if your limited merit would ever permit it

Give up. Forfeit.

No one would see your debt plan and think to pass it. 

And thats the kicker, you're the presidents own personal bootlicker. 

 

Dear Mr Asshat

You think you're so high up, high riding, high flying

Bye, get your head out of the ground, stop mining, 

All your ermine and fine dining

You wish you were as smart as me, we can all see your pining

Limited merit? Your brains dont half reach it

Secretary of state? Your intellect doesnt half meet it. 

As for me being The presidents bootlicker

Ill fit mine in your mouth and ask you to shine it

You ask me to throw in the towel

Watch how i'll make you completely empty your bowels

Unless it wasnt clear you cow i'll make you go back to virginia with a trowel and actually work

Its time you stopped abusing your perks

 

Dear Mr. Hamilton

My how rude

You make me sound like such a prude 

But at least I care that our citizens get food

And not just oblige when I get in the mood 

You should have proved you would do what you couldve when you had the opportunity and not prance about with your shiny new felicity

Now you want to make nicey nice

But you know you will have to pay the price

I dont really want to break the ice and you know what? Anything thicker than you should suffice. 

(Psst you probably have lice) 

 

Dear Dickbag 

Perhaps you haven't heard 

But some of us actually keep their word

You haven't really learnt and watched the bridges all burn

You turn them against me and suggest that all this is what I earned?

Bitch please, as though its none of your concern 

Now is the rare chance for you to show care for something that has nothing to do with france. 

I really meant it when I said your sentiments and predicaments were clear at a glance. 

But please, Im not criticising you 

Theres no cause to be blue even though whats true is so easily seen through 

Let me give you a clue: Go back to france, you insolent tool. 

At least there more people think you rule. 

Oh and hey hey, you calling me thick?

Why good sir, I never knew I had such allure.

**Author's Note:**

> A little indulgent writing. It felt like poetry, but without any discernable structure. My favorite rap line in the musical is probably "Thomas Jefferson always hesitant with the president..." So I tried to do something similar in the line about the towel. Enjoy :D  
> Also, fanart! https://brainypaperbullets.tumblr.com/post/158800834392/cabinet-battles-must-be-terribly-unproductive


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